


To The Grave

by unknowableroom_archivist



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Drama, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-01-22
Updated: 2011-02-10
Packaged: 2019-01-19 21:35:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 1,729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12418626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/unknowableroom_archivist/pseuds/unknowableroom_archivist
Summary: Everyone has secrets.  These are the ones they took with them





	1. James Potter

**Author's Note:**

> Note from ChristyCorr, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [Unknowable Room](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Unknowable_Room), a Harry Potter archive active from 2005-2016. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project after May 2017. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Unknowable Room collection profile](http://www.archiveofourown.org/collections/unknowableroom).

James Potter

 

  1. I never really thought that I had a chance with Lily.As horrifying as it was, what she had with Snape was just too fucking strong.Even after the whole O.W.L. affair I thought they would somehow end up together in the end.
  2. That time Sirius called me “Reg” I heard but didn’t say anything.It wasn’t out of respect for him or insensitivity – except in so much as I just didn’t know what to say.I always liked to pretend with him that Regulus had never meant all that much.
  3. The same thing with the time I walked in on Sirius crying in the bathroom after he first showed us his Animagus form – the same black dog of his family’s crest.Like I say before, he and I liked to pretend his family had never mattered to him.
  4. I wasn’t given the Invisibility Cloak on my eleventh birthday.I stole it from my father’s closet.I let the house elves take the rap for it.
  5. Lily always got mad when I brushed off her problems with Petunia.Of course her sister was just jealous of her.Everyone was jealous of her.Even I was jealous of her, she didn’t have to try so very hard to be brilliant all the time.
  6. Using Peter Pettigrew for Secret Keeper was Sirius’s idea.I had my doubts.  Not about his faithfulness, just his ability to pull it off.It’s easy to forget he was always the best at keeping our secrets in school.
  7. Deep down, I think I wanted it to be Harry and not Neville Longbottom.I always had this insane competitive thing with Frank, and, well, we’re all idiots about how important our children will be.
  8. I was actually kind of relieved when Sirius flubbed his Quidditch try-outs.He would have been a nightmare to coach, and Peter always got so upset when he didn’t have one of us to hang around with.Plus Sirius would have been an absolute wreck playing against his brother.He didn’t need a Confundus charm, just Regulus’s presence.
  9. It’s very sweet and fitting that Lily’s a doe and I’m a stag, but somehow it doesn’t feel as intimate as the fact that Snape’s Patronus matches hers completely.I hate that while I might “complete” Lily, as she says, he is her other half.
  10. When I first started asking Lily out, it was entirely to annoy Snape.It wasn’t until after she yelled at me during the O.W.L. incident that I realized how much I had come to like her.

 

 


 


	2. Lily Potter

Lily Potter

 

  1. I always knew what Snape was like.It wasn’t exactly hard to spot with the way he treated Petunia from the very beginning.I pretended I didn’t know because I loved talking about magic with him so much.
  2. I always thought Mary MacDonald was half – well, no, not half, but - a quarter-responsible for what happened with the Slytherins.She could have fought back.I was mad at her too, for letting Muggleborns get a bad rap.
  3. I would have said yes to James the first time he asked me out if he hadn’t asked right in front of Snape.
  4. Even so, I wanted to.That’s when I started hating both of them, because they had to make me choose.
  5. I never forgave any of the Marauders for making me be the one to say what we all suspected about Remus – because I knew what it was to lose a friend to the Dark.I don’t think they ever forgave me for saying it, not really.
  6. I was never entirely okay with the fact that Remus was a werewolf.I got the whole thing about it not being him and the man half being what mattered, but he never seemed to pay enough mind to the fact that the wolf part could still kill and was still real.However angsty he got, he took a hell of a lot of chances with everyone’s lives.
  7. I wanted a girl.I didn’t want to have a boy at the same time as Petunia, where they would be set up in constant competition at family reunions.I knew how bad that could go oh so quickly.
  8. I still liked to pretend that we could go to family reunions.
  9. Snape’s Darkness was terrible and frightening, but there was always something attractive about it as well – until he let it become ugly.
  10. I’m the one that set off the stinkbomb that threw the whole wedding party into chaos during the photo session.The whole thing was getting just too perfect, which to a Marauder meant that something was about to go terribly wrong.So I headed them off at the pass, lest they do actual damage.

 

 


 


	3. Peter Pettigrew

Peter Pettigrew 

  1. I amnot a coward.
  2. I’mnot afraid of spiders.I’ll kill them or let them be at home, but in public well, it just goes along so well with everyone thinking I’m a coward and that I only get my strength and bravery from trying to be like James and Sirius and Remus.
  3. Sometimes I think the hardest part about joining wasn’t the betrayal involved but giving up my mother’s old dream of the Order of Merlin.She always wanted it so badly, sometimes I thought it was the only way she’d ever really see me.Ironic.
  4. However convenient it is, I’m still insulted that they would think me a coward.
  5. I can keep a secret.
  6. That’s why, to this day, Sirius thinks Regulus Confunded him from behind the stands during his Quidditch tryout.It wasn’t.I didn’t want to be the only Marauder without either Quidditch practice or prefect meetings on Thursday nights.
  7. Dumbledore offered me the prefect badge originally.I wouldn’t take it – I didn’t think my role in the Marauders could survive being the killjoy.
  8. I know everyone’s all “Lily and James are so _perfect!_ ” but I kind of don’t see it.I mean, she’s mouthy and funny but knows where to draw the line.How’s James ever going to learn that there _is_ one with a girl who’s always flirting with it?He needs someone to draw it for him.
  9. It was a week before I showed the others my Animagus form.I thought they wouldn’t appreciate the size and species.
  10. It was my idea to become Animagi, but I didn’t think the others would take it coming from me.I could always play Sirius like a fiddle.
 


 


	4. Sirius Black

Sirius Black

1.Andromeda only became my favorite cousin later.When we were kids she was way too laid back and pacifistic to be as much fun as Bella.

2.I was always a little relieved about the flubbed Quidditch try-outs - not least because Regulus cared enough to Confund me to avoid playing against me.

3.I suggested and insisted on the switch of Secret Keepers because Remus already knew about the plan to use the Fidelius Charm.I knew he would swear up and down that it was me.Right about that at least.

4.I think I did go mad in Azkaban.

5.I have never been drunk.Oh, I’ve acted drunk.It’s a family tradition - those Blacks always saw the advantage of being the alert ones in a room of dulled wits.

6.The hardest part about being back at Grimmauld Place was how easily it started to feel like home again.I hated it when it was my home…but there’s something about the house you grow up in that never leaves you.

7.It wasn’t Snape I told about the knot on the Whomping Willow.I saved Regulus from a furious blow to the head then cursed him to be unable to go near it again.I can’t believe he used Snape to explore for him.Clever bugger.

8.I drove off every one of Lily’s friends.I didn’t even think most of them were the traitor.I just didn’t want it to be one of the guys.It wasn’t until the last one broke off contact that I even let myself consider it.

9.Harry didn’t fly as well as his father.He might have in time, but you really couldn’t match James with how much he practiced and studied the game.

10.I told Dora that Remus liked her but was too shy to make a move one day. More because I was bored than because I thought they’d actually make a go of it.


	5. Remus Lupin

Remus Lupin

1.The Map wasn’t confiscated while we were at Hogwarts.Suspecting that Sirius and James would tear it to pieces fighting over it, I pretended Filch caught me and smuggled it to a promising first year.Apparently I should have gone for a more experienced prankster, because I’m told it ended up in Filch’s possession all the same.

2.I’m the one who hung Peter’s pants from the Goal Hoops the night before the big match.Luckily, Sirius was too drunk to be able to deny that he did it himself as they all assumed.

3.I wasn’t entire sure I wouldn’t attack my friends even in their Animagus forms.

4.I once walked in on Snape, having apparently bullied Lily into an empty classroom, begging her to take him back.We both thought James didn’t need to know.

5.I kept at least a piece of my mind the night that Peter escaped.I would never have hurt Harry.I was going for the Rat when Sirius got in the way.

6.I had seen the name Sirius Black on the Marauders’ Map once before that fateful night in the Whomping Willow.I told no one, I simply went into the Forest where I had seen him.I wanted to kill him myself.I think I nearly did.

7.I had decided to leave Dora before I found out she was pregnant.

8.I didn’t take the Wolfsbane Potion with me when I ran away.I barely made it to a secured space in time to avoid the risk of hurting anyone.

9.I was never going to tell Harry how closely I’d known his parents.I couldn’t handle it - the thought of stepping into James and Lily’s shoes.I always knew I should never be put in charge of a child.

10.I used five Unforgivables at the Battle of Hogwarts before I even saw Dora fall.

 


End file.
